Sunday 1 April 2012

Olivia's 100 Word Challenge Week 26


The chocolate bunny melted in the sun
Ah, finished. My first chocolate bunny. I worked for lint chocolate and I had just finished the world’s first chocolate rabbit, but things were about to go horribly wrong.
I wanted to show my boss my new creation but I couldn't find him anywhere so I put the delicious milk sculpture on a table right beneath the sun. I ran to the lift, ugh it was occupied. Stairs it was then. I ran to the fourth floor and knocked on my boss’s door. “Come in,” said James.
“I’ve got a new creation; I have made a chocolate bunny, smooth and creamy,” I said arrogantly. I ran down to the bottom floor and ran to the place where I had left the bunny. All that was left was a pile of brown slush.

5 comments:

  1. Olivia,
    Fantastic entry! You've separated your topics with paragraphs, used speech, and created a character with personality! I enjoyed reading this 100WC very much. Keep writing! Mrs. Doebley, English Teacher, Ocean City, NJ, USA

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    Replies
    1. Olivia (mapleclassgreenfeilds.blogspot.com)20 April 2012 at 10:53

      Thank you for both of your comments. I enjoyed reading them because you have told me what I have done well.
      Thank you from Olivia at Greenfeilds.

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  2. Oliva,
    Well, I'd say the bunny was still "soft and creamy!" I enjoyed reading your story very much. Thanks for your participation in the 100WC. Mrs. Doebley, Teacher of English, Ocean City, NJ, USA

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  3. Hi liv
    I love your 100 wc! It is amazing. I like the idea that it was your first chocolate bunny you made and you worked for lint! Great 100 wc! Smasher x

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  4. Prawnsandhummus20 April 2012 at 06:41

    The build up to the story was excellent! Also I really liked the way your character was so arrogant but then so dissapointed! Keep writing :) (I did an emoticon!!!!

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